As 2020 comes to a close, there is a feeling of cautious optimism looms everywhere.
After the abyss of the Covid-19 pandemic, we desperately want to drink champagne, start new diets, set new goals, take bucket list vacations. Cue the #NewYearNewMe memes! We are over it. We. Are. Just. Fucking. Over. It. 2021, glad to see you!
But, we’re still kind of in This Thing so it feels weird and awkward. Let’s be honest, literally everything about 2020 has been weird and awkward. Zoom Happy Hours, washing our groceries, day drinking on Tuesdays, vaxxies..and I’m not even touching the rough stuff. Seriously, how much weirder can it get?
But, my inspiring-kind-of-annoying optimism has not wavered. I believe we are all capable of turning things around in 2021. In fact, I am 100% certain of it. First, we have to shift our mindset, our focus and get back to the basics that work all the time for all of us. They are available to everyone and they’re free. So no excuses here, Darling.
In 2011, I wrote an article, “How To Be A Lucky Bitch In 2012” for The Huffington Post. Every year in the decade since then, its resonance with readers has been proven by the thousands of reposts around the world. This year, perhaps more than any preceding year, we could all use a refresher course on creating good luck. While the landscape may have shifted since then, the fundamental ideas remain the same.
Luck is a funny thing. Those who have the good kind, believe they are lucky. Those who have “bad luck”, think they were born with bad luck.
I believe I have extraordinary luck. I am reminded of this every day. I’m not a self-help guru that holds The Secret to All Good Things. I have experienced heartbreak, loss, overwhelming sadness, financial hardship and life-threatening illnesses I pray you never experience. And still, I look at my life as one overflowing with amazing luck. We all have the same story, it’s just how you choose to craft it. Nobody on earth is simply born “blessed”. When you change the way you view your own story, you change the direction of your life. Seems pretty easy, right? It is, you just need to identify the tools and practice them. So how do you do it? I’m not 100% sure, but here are some ways I’ve used to unleash lots of good luck in my life.
Understand What Luck Isn’t
People often confuse fortune, chance and luck. Because of this, the thinking is that everything that happens is very random. Not true. Let me explain. Fortune are things outside of your control, it’s what happens to you. For example, I am fortunate to have healthy children. I’m fortunate to have long eyelashes. I am fortunate that I grew up in New York City. Chance is something you must do. You have to take a chance. It requires action, like asking a girl for her number, applying for a school, trying a new hairstyle. Luck is where you have much more control. You make your own luck by planning in advance.
Learn To Be Lucky
Luck is not something that happens to you; it’s something that happens because of you.
You can actually create luck, which means that you can teach yourself to become luckier. If you’re lazy and unwilling to do the work, you will not get lucky. Instead of cynically muttering, “Some guys have all the luck” or “She’s a lucky bitch” why not try and see what happens? I am a lifelong “tryer” and believe my willingness to learn new skills without fear of failure has helped bring me an abundance of good luck. The more you try things you think you can’t do and succeed, the more confidence you will have. Read that sentence again. This is key in becoming lucky.
There are opportunities at every corner, but you have to be ready to grasp them. While there may have been fewer opportunities in 2020, they were still there. The same opportunities are available for all of us, but the lucky ones prepare for them and consequently, have the confidence to pursue them. We like to think it’s about being in the right place at the right time-it’s not. It’s about being in the right state of mind that propels you to take a chance. More chances, more luck. It’s not easy, but it is very simple.
Find Something You’re Good At
The words, “follow your dreams” sometimes make me cringe. That might surprise you, but hear me out. Let’s say I want to be a famous singer but I’m tone deaf. I can “follow my dreams” from here to “America’s Got Talent”, but if I have no vocal talent, I am more likely be met with a truckload of disappointment and a life spent hustling to pay the rent as a waitress. Identify what you’re good at-or even kind of good at-and then actually do it. For example, I have always had an eye for style. I could put together chic outfits and decorate a room like a pro-even when I had no money. I liked it because I was good at it. I took a chance and started a business and learned everything about the industry. I just did it. When a TV producer called me to appear on a hit show, I was ready. Then came the money, followed by everyone saying I was so lucky I picked up the phone and got asked to be on a national television show. I was passionate, took a chance, prepapared and then I got lucky. See what I mean?
Build A Lucky Network
Stay in contact with positive people and those you admire. In 2020, this was especially challenging-but not impossible. Be a good friend, but also be open to meeting new people. Now more than ever, there are several ways to connect with others outside of person to person contact. Lose negative people in your life quickly, but don’t pay any attention to them. Never pay any attention to them, it’s a waste of time and only brings you down. They’re already there, leave them there and wish them the best. Always wish them the best.
Do Good Things
If you don’t believe in karma, then you most certainly don’t believe in luck because they go hand in hand. You have to do good things for other people in order for good to come to you. Donate your money, your time and your spirit. Give when there is little public glory in doing so. Be kind, grateful and humble. It sounds so sappy, but it’s so true. The more you give, the more life will reward you. You have to want good things for others. Anything contrary is a negative emotion that arouses negative results. There is enough room for everyone to be successful.
Ignore The Noise
The luckier you are, the better your life will be. The better your life gets, the more annoying this will be to some people. They cannot understand how you are so #blessed and they’re not. The people who get so focused on “How’d they do that?” are clouded in jealousy, so they never allow the good luck to come to them. They will try to copy you, they may even speak ill of you. This is irrelevant. Never let this bother you, shrug it off and pay no attention to it. There will always be naysayers, there will always be people who want to bring you down. Don’t go for the bait and just keep doing your thing. Try not to be nervous.
I wish you the best of luck in using these tips in your own life.
Happy New Year, World!